yeah im mad

Ok,
So I am going to point something out that maybe I just want to talk about because im frustrated beyond belief right now, or maybe I just want to talk about it...
 IF YOU ARE GOING TO ASK A FRIEND FOR ACCOUNTABILITY, AND YOU make them miss out on something fun so that you don't do something dumb...then that friend falls asleep wakes up and CATCHES YOU DOING SOMETHING DUMB...dont be surprised when they call you out on that thing, and they call you out on doing the right thing when you arent doing the right thing...
 I really...wow I want to blow up right now,  dont understand why and how people can be so stupid.. Don't talk to me about wanting to go into ministry when you are flipping sleeping in bed with another person....
hreghGHGFHakmfbhguewiqkdnbfhuikmsbh....those are my angry words that  I dont know how to deal with *Sigh*
Whatever...it doesn't matter because the rest of my day is going to be awesome...I am going to go surprise my mom for thanksgiving, and I am so excited for that :) ..... I am trying to listen to music that doesnt make me angry so i dont kill anyone :) ....Ok i wouldnt really kill anyone but i would make unwise choices so i probably shouldnt do that .....
..................Where are my friends when I need them -_- ...... I do not want to make choices that will really do me no good
*Sigh* its fine i will get over it
...Im going to go listen to some angry music now and let things go :)

The gospel

Was reminded of how important the gospel was this morning, Well, i guess it was more of a challange to remember just how important the gospel is, but it really is important and so often, I am bound to forget this..My heart does wonder just like that wonderful hymm says...Lord bound my wandering heart to you <3 ...I really am so sad sometimes that I forget or dont think about how wonderful the gospel is, and I realize thats why so often we fall short of what we know we love, we know we can do.. Because we dont love and thank the Lord for what He has done for us, we dont think that the gospel is anything of any importance anymore. Yes Yes, we think that the gospel is important because well thats how we got saved, but now how is it applicable to our lives right now? as we are walking, as we our living our Christian lives?
   The thing is the gospel IS part of our everydays...Its a daily reminder of how thankful I need to be for the God I have, the one who gave up everything. the fact that I KNOW I cannot do anything to either make the Lord love me more, or less...and I am so thankful for this at times, and yet at other times utterly frustrated..because I DO want to make God love me more sometimes, now that is just my foolishness getting in there, but wither or not its right...Its true..
I am so thankful for the fact we have reminders in our lives, that we can be off the track for a little bit and then we are reminded and God is like doop doop doop get back up there little buddy. I love that He doesn't let us go too far...and we have reminders, people who let us know whats going down, and then we are back up back moving...thank you for that Lord :)

o_0

Man,
This time in Maine has been continually intense, I know i havent written much, as i dont have a lap top with me currently, so it's a little difficult to make it happen at the moment. God has been so good to me though, and I really enjoy that. My friend Bekah's mom passed away on Halloween. while sad for us, a praise also because she is no longer hurting and she is with her savior..and that is an amazing thing all together.
    I really am enjoying being in Maine, While difficult, and at time frustrating I know God is going to do amazing things. I met a really cool girl named Amberlyn, and we are getting close! It's exciting to see what God is going to do in her life.
  We are not able to stay in the apartment that we are in now, so we are actually going to end up living with Amberlyn, which is really cool because we really get along together well, and bekah obviously gets along with her well because they have been friends longer then we have....lol
  I am going home to surprise my mom for thanksgiving and that is an amazing thing ....I am really excited to go home and see elijah, and see everyone..
          The new church that I have, is really awesome .....I love the pastor, and I love what God is doing. It's really hard for me to open up to people, but i know that God has something amazing planned and that it will work out :)
.......
 Im tired, and hungry all at the same time..I know you are glad to know it